my friend colleen over at Adventures in Rettland asked me to guest post on her blog this month-the topic was thankfulness/gratitude-here is what I wrote:
suddenly it is november.
i swear i just put away the christmas decorations. time certainly does fly.
november is probably one of my favorite months-especially in
California with the weather we are so lucky to have. but also because of
thanksgiving, family time, amazingly colored leaves. it is a time to
give thanks, and reflect on the year that just flashed before our eyes.
i think i’m thankful everyday-at least subconsciously. I know it is
pretty amazing that I wake up each morning and can swing my legs out
from under the covers and walk toward the coffee maker. i know how lucky
i am to have a husband and two kids under my roof who drive me crazy,
make me laugh, and love me unconditionally. i have food, a car that
works, a job that fulfills and friends and family that i can turn to in
tough times. i’m really thankful for those. honestly.
grade school was tough, I was picked on (yeah we all were but anyone
else have their entire fourth grade class in a club called the I Hate
in high school i made some poor choices that took me down some hard roads.
college: academic suspension after my freshman year. (I begged the Dean
to let me come back and he did-ended up with all A’s and B’s my last two
had some majorly huge falling outs with dear friends along the way. i
have suffered with minor anxiety and depression off and on since high
my parents both died when i was relatively young-my dad when I was 27, my mom when I was 33.
two years after my mom died, Avery was diagnosed.
some of this I had to get through alone, but most was made better by
my friends. all of it shaped me into the person i am today-strong, a
fighter, imperfect. so much good has fallen into my lap because of the
and the friends? oh the friends. new and old. i have learned so much
from my them-about who I am, what I believe, what I cherish. my friends
take me for who I am. they know my deepest secrets and insecurities and
they build me up and choose to stick by me. I have friends that
encourage me to be my true self-to show my weaknesses, to be
vulnerable. they give me the space to do just that. they call me out
when im being an asshole, cheer me on, and hold my hand as my tears
they laugh-at me, at themselves, at life. they share honestly and
openly in that perfect moment when it is ok to let go. i wait for those
moments. those are the moments when you feel most alive aren’t they?
when a friend trusts you enough to look at you and say “i’m scared” or
“i’m sad” or “i’m so proud of myself! I cannot believe i did it!”. that
-vulnerability- it is really what life is all about.
i wonder a lot if i would be this person had all those unfortunate
incidents not occurred in my life. i can honestly say that I wouldn’t.
i know it. you gotta have some tough in your life to really appreciate
the easy. otherwise the easy stuff becomes boring and can be taken for
granted and you never see the beauty that comes with pain.
As my wise friend Colleen said “I feel like I have been given a front
row seat to the most beautiful show on earth”. (i totally butchered
that and might have left out an expletive…but you get my drift). either
way she is right.
so i’m thankful for the tough times. all of them. and my friends and
family who have been, are, and will be there for me when another tough
thing is thrown my way.